The Cards We Pull
Have you ever had a conversation with someone that turned into a disagreement and their final word was 'Well I'm pulling the XXXXX card on this one.' Now the card might be the boss card, the mental health card, the favour card, the well-being card, the parent card or anything in between.
It's actually something that annoys me and it's right up there with people who start a sentence with 'As a mother...'
The fact is, we can all pull any card we want. This morning I could have pulled the weather card and decided against walking my dog in single digit conditions. I could have pulled the boss card and said that I need to work from home as I have a lot of things on my plate. I could have pulled the female card to avoid having to lug equipment and tents into the back of a trailer for a sports carnival.
We all have plenty of cards and we can all pull the cards.
But a deck of cards doesn't work like that. You only have limited numbers of cards which means you can't keep playing the same few cards… or can we?
The card you pull is when you are out of options, reasons or arguments. It's the full stop, period, the conversation is over statement that rarely can be argued with. You use them when you are out of options and they are often accompanied with a side of guilt.
What if we start pulling the kindness card, care card or compassion card? These cards would be used without expectation of a rebuttal, as an offer to help without expectation or reason or argument. Can we use the term 'Let me help you' or 'Let's choose kind' in the same annoying frequency as we hear the 'As a mother...' sentence stem. Can you imagine saying ‘I’m pulling the kindness card on this one and giving the person the benefit of the doubt’. Or ‘I’m pulling the care card on this one and checking in with them on my way home from work’. Or ‘I’m pulling the compassion card on this one and sticking up for the person who is not in the room’.
The wonderful thing about kindness, care and compassion cards? They replenish and multiply as much as you use them. You never feel guilty for using them and I am sure you would get a laugh if you said 'I'm pulling the kindness card and helping you' rather than 'I am pulling the sick card and not coming in'.
Could we even shorten this as Australians do and say 'pull a kind-ie' rather than 'pull a sickie'.
This coming Monday morning, pull a ‘kind-ie’ and buy someone a coffee, bring in a treat for the staff room or give someone a phone call. For someone who was considering pulling a sickie, it might just be the kindness card they need.
Anne-Marie
